Being an entrepreneur is exciting, creative and inspirational, yet sometimes it can be challenging. One of my favourite quotes in life is “It is not enough to have a dream if I am not willing to pursue it.” I hold this as a core and central mantra. I pursue my dreams with my heart, body and soul. However lately as I have been working, creating and manifesting my dreams, the people who care for me have been raising concerns. It comes down to this. They think I am taking on too much. That I might not be able to do the things it takes to manifest my dreams. That I can’t do what it is I want to do. In short they can’t see the vision I can and they are concerned for my well being. Although well meant, their concerns have became an increasing source of irritation and frustration for me. I felt as though no-one believed in me, that their limiting beliefs were limiting my possibilities. Like I was the only person on the planet that could see my potential. Do you know that feeling? It’s hella de-motivating ain’t it. Especially when disbelief comes from your own internal doubts.
Infact let’s be honest, it’s more than demotivating. It can feel almost vampiric in the amount of energy in how other peoples disbelief drains you. Two things happen. Either you believe them and lose all belief in yourself. Or you fight it (as I used to) and use too much of your energy trying to get them to believe in you. Either reaction is exhausting. And in the worse case scenario, their seemingly lack of belief in you means, that you don’t put everything into making your dreams and you end up giving up altogether. Yey way to go loved ones you crushed my dreams! Or at least that’s how you can view it if you like to play victim.
I don’t. I believe that everything in life is trying to teach us something. And after the universe had sent 6 people, all close to me, to say “hey are you sure you can do this?” I decided that instead of reacting in the two traditional ways, I would take the third option. Respond. Find the teaching. The gift of learning from their non belief and the teaching of their concerns. All at once their concerns became an opportunity to really find out if I could make my dream a reality in a very practical way. I am now more certain than ever I can achieve my dreams because now I have looked and KNOW how I can do it. Because of this process I now know that if someone else asks me “Can you really do this?” I can answer with a confident “YES!” It also had the extremely beneficial effect of silencing my own internal doubts in my abilities because I now know what I can do and how I am going to do it.
If you are in a situation where you have a dream that you want to pursue and someone doesn’t believe you can do it (even if that someone is you,) follow my process for turning disbelief into a belief and you will discover how you can manifest your dreams.
Accept the gift
First things first accept the gift. You have to see the disbelief as a teaching gift and opportunity to learn. You have to do this to free up the energy and motivation inside yourself to find out how you are going to do what you want to do. If your emotions are frustrated and irritated you won’t be able to find the teachings. Mentally, or even physically thank them for their concern and caring for you. After all they are trying to help.
Find the why
Why are they concerned? Ask them. Maybe they can in their objective position see something you can’t. It doesn’t have to be something that will stop you manifesting your dream. It could just be something you haven’t thought of that you need to factor in. This is seriously useful to be made aware of. So find out why they are concerned for you and again be grateful for the fresh perspective they are giving you.
Take on the realism glasses
Look at your dream. Really look. Not through the rose tinted glasses but through the realism glasses. What will it take for you to create it? Brainstorm this. See each step of the creation process. And then take a step back and look at it. Ask yourself if this is realistic? What will need to change in my life to create this? What am I willing to change in order to manifest my dream and what am I not willing to change?
For example: One of my dreams is that I want to create a better steady income doing something I love. However in order to create that steady income I was going to have to have a period of building up my business. The reality was I would have to become a lot better to sticking to a budget than I am currently am. I was willing to go self employed however I knew that I would need to get professional advice to create a realistic budget and a fixed income from a part-time job to build up my business steadily. I didn’t want to have a part-time job, and if for a few years if that’s what it takes, then that’s what it takes.
Know what you can and can’t do
In order to believe you can create you dream you need to know what you can and can’t do. You will already have a toolbox of skills and some you need to gain. Write a list of what you can do and what you can’t do. On the can’t do side if there is something there you need to manifest your dreams how can you get the help you need? Do you need to be educated? Can you call in specialist help? Do you know someone already in your network who can help you with this? Turn those can’ts into cans by finding a solution.
And keep adding to your I can list. It will boost your self confidence. So read it whenever you need a reminder of how talented and clever you are.
Answer their concerns
Now look at each concern. Write them down. Respond to each one. Relate back to your skills and your realist understanding of how to manifest your dreams. Use this process as a secondary reality check list. If you have investigated all of their concerns and do your research you will be able to answer their concerns with facts and knowledge. Most people’s concerns are often about potential emergencies so this is a great way to cover your back, especially if your dream means a dramatic lifestyle change.
Make a plan
By now you should have a really great idea of exactly what it’s going to take to manifest your dream. This gives you a great foundation for planning out the steps you need to take to create your dream. Make a plan. Keep it realistic. Overestimate the time you will need to manifest it. This is going to be your guidebook to making your dreams come true. Make it detailed. Also be honest with yourself. If there is anything on that plan you doubt you can do or are unsure if it is realistic make it real. So for example if you want to set up your own marketing business but are unsure if you know enough about accounting then include getting an accountant or financial advice into your plan.
Plan your response
Now it’s time to go back to the beginning. Plan your response for when people raise concerns. This is not so much to defend yourself it is a really useful tool for gainig clarity . It make you 100% clear in your own mind that you know what you are doing and how you are going to do it.
This process is great for insights and clarity into manifesting you dreams, as well as transforming disbelief into belief. Of course you can’t plan for every eventuality along the path of manifesting your dreams. Minor hiccups and massive unseen opportunities will always turn up. However if you have worked through this process you will be prepared and confident. Two of the major ingredients of success. Isn’t it amazing how irritation, frustration and disbelief can be a great gift in manifesting our dreams. It just takes changing our perspective to looking for the teaching and choosing to respond with positive, determined action. In a way the process brings us full circle because when you know what you have to do and how you are going to do it actually empowers you to pursue your dreams
Enjoy chasing your dreams this week <3