“Save a penny and walk, and be thankful” is a saying that has stayed with me since my childhood. I first heard it in the book Ballet Shoes where bus fares cost a penny and it was better to walk than waste the money. This phrase for some reason has stuck with me. It reeks of common sense. The practical thing to do. It wasn’t until a few years ago that I realised that although it is full of common sense and hints at strong moral fibre, is also full of a poverty mindset.
A poverty mindset is the opposite of abundance thinking. No matter how much you have in life you will never feel as though you have enough. Ebenezer Scrooge is the best known poverty mindset literary character. The richest man in town with a tiny fire and hardly any candles scrimping, saving and living a mean life. Yet not all people with a poverty mindset are as extreme as Scrooge. Poverty mindset is sneaky and tricksy and often unbeknown to its owner is hidden deep within their psyche. I see it alot in my line of work and this week I have been travelling in Austria with a whole family with a poverty mindset. (And yes it has been challenging.) Rather than spend a little on a warm drink they at cold sandwiches freezing on a bench in the snow. Ate up all their food on a plate in the restaurant even if they were already stuffed full, just because it is the right thing to do. Sat in agony with back pain and refusing relief, help or even a cushion. They cut corners wherever they could resulting in unnecessary uncomfort, and sometimes downright stupidity, under the cover of the it’s the right thing to do. Whilst I in my usual way celebrated the moment, looked for opportunities and found so many of them (such as a magical ice village up a mountain and swimming outside in a snowstorm). And was very much looked down upon by said family. However I had a great time and I am returning home with pocket full of beautiful memories which I wouldn’t trade for all of the euros in theirs.
It got me thinking. Why do we believe that having a poverty mindset in life is morally correct and look down on those who choose to celebrate abundance? In my book the answer is twofold low self worth and jealousy. People with a poverty mindset either:
- Don’t believe they are worth much and therefore have too low self worth to ask for what they want or need.
- Are jealous of others in their lifestyle and the things they have and would rather blame and play victim than take a deep look at themselves.
In both cases they do not believe themselves to be rich in life and therefore never will be. I feel sorry for them. I know how it is. I used to be just the same. Today I know that I am rich. I love my life. Is it because I have a lot of money? No. Is it because I have lots of expensive stuff? Definitely not. (Well I do have a lot of stuff just a lot of it comes from 2nd hand shops- I love a bargain!) It is because I have a bank full of memories, eyes that look for opportunities and a very grateful heart. And not in the least I practise the art of luxury.
The art of luxury is my own creation. It could also be called the art of because I am worth it. Or the art of because I deserve it. Everybody deserves to have luxery in their life, to enjoy abundance. However sometimes abundance can be a challenging challenging concept to manifest in reality. Practising the art of luxury makes it very straightforward.
First you have to realise that everyone deserves to be treated or rewarded in life. When I work with clients on manifesting goals, I always ask how will you reward yourself? Often this seems like a strange concept to people. However the logic is simple. You have out in effort, you have created something, challenged yourself you deserve a reward. As adults we don’t often have the supportive cheerleading team we had as children. The compliments and praise that got us through potty training, joined up handwriting and university is scarce. Rewarding ourselves is a way of giving our selves that cheer squad boost. Now some people disagree with this carrot and a stick method but to them my arguement is this. Humans are designed to need praise, if we didn’t need it then how would parents teachers and bosses giving praise or promotions get such good results? We love to strive for a reward. You deserve to be rewarded. To have nice experiences in life. There was no human born on this planet the was born with the intent that they should be miserable. So recognise this and give yourself permission to enjoy the beauty and wonder available in life. Even if that is someone offering you a pillow and a pain killer when your back is hurting.
So once you have recognise that you deserve to be rewarded, to feel lifes abundance you need to start looking for it. Nothing gets you noticing the good in life like having an attitude of gratitude. BEing grateful for both the small and big wonders in life is the BIGGEST step to practising abundance and the art of luxery. When you become grateful for lifes many blessings you realsie how wonderful life is. Wether its the morning cup of coffee, the great compliment you got at work or the family all sitting enjoying dinner together all the things you are grateful for become the guidelines of how you enjoy life.
What does luxery mean to me?
Now we all know there are different strokes for different folks and it’s the same with your personal definition of luxery. I mean none of us would complain with a billion dollar life style I am sure but if that is your only definition of luxery then you are going to have a very dissapointing life. You may of course reach that shiny land. However if your eyes are only on the prize then you won’t get to enjoy the journey. So define what makes you feel like you are expeiriencing luxery, experiencing abundance. For me it can be an evening alone. A single glass of champagne. Watching a film I really wanted to see. Travelling. Adventures. The list is endless and made up of both small and big luxeries. Make a list of what is luxouirous for you.
Oppertunities comes in 2 parts. The first is that you have the oppertunity to create moments when you enjoy luxery such as today I went to the spa. I have been planning it and looking forward to it for such a long time. It was to reward myself for all my hard work last year and to indulge in a day of self love practise (one of this and last year’s major themes for me). So create your moments of luxery. Plan them. Plan one right now and go write it in your diary…go on… I’ll wait….Good.
The second is simply that you ask yourself in any given situation *what would make this moment better for me? ‘ Basically you look for the oppertunities before you. This week I was up a mountain (you know as people are) It was a glorious sunny day, the view was stunning. And I noticed someone in the restaurant near the viewing platform was drinking champagne and that is one of my luxeries. So I ordered myself a glass and enjoyed the view. Then I saw that there was another set of cable cars going down the mountain to somewhere I didn’t know and hadn’t been. So of course as I had oodles of time I went down and evetually found a lovely watefall (and the way back home). Now I know not everyone has the time or the money to do this. However there is always a way to make an experience feel more luxourius you just have to look at the oppertunities you have around you.
The point is that yes you can save a penny and walk, that’s your choice. But do it because it makes you feel good, or find a way to make it good for you. But choose. Don’t deny yourself luxery in life because of a hidden dominant poverty mindset. You are in control of your life. You overcome , you achieve and you deserve to be rewarded. The art of luxery is just a tool to help you connect with a feeling of abundance. Did I appreciate the mountain view without the champagne? Of course. But with it the memory became more special and I felt so much gratitude to be where I was, doing what I was doing and I know I will never forget it. These are the moments that make me feel rich and abundant in life. I hope that by practising the art of luxery you will feel rich and abundant in yours. After all you are worth it.
HAve an amazing week <3