#lifelessons 101- Shedding light on the joy in our lives – inspiration for creating your own Yuletide/Solstice traditions

Today is a special day. It is the shortest day of the year. The Winter Solstice. When the sun sets today the longest night will start and at dawn the summer sun is born as the days gradually get a little bit longer. I love the duality and the magic of this time. The idea and fact that in the middle of the dark grey winter the summer is born.  The days getting longer is truely something to celebrate. And humans have been doing it since the dawn of time.

In many spiritual paths wether its Christmas and the birth of Jesus, or the Winter Solstice and the new born sun, or you celebrate Chanuka the festival of light or Pancha Ganapati in honur of the god of culture and new begingings, in human collective world culture we all agree that this is a time of celebrating joy, light birth and new beginings.  The amount of spiritual tradtions bulit around this time of year goes to show that before the internet,  electricity and indoor toilets and way back beyond the time when you were just a twinkle in your great grandparent’s eyes the winter solstice was important to us as a species.

Today Christmas has become a holiday that many celebrate not out of faith but out of habit, family culture or just simply because they get time off work as it’s a national holiday.  It has become indesputably commecialised and many people feel that the true spirit of Christmas is forgotten about. Now what that is can spark a whole different debate so we are not going to go down that rabbit hole today. And that seems as shame to me as beyond the coca cola red santa or the pre christmas bargin sales, we all have a basic need of celeberating the good in our lives here in the midwinter.

Now I have always loved Christmas ( I am my mother’s daughter). However, the tinsel did start to be a little too guilded as I grew older. Not because I didn’t enjoy the time, I just couldn’t find the sustenance in it and that for me took some of the joy. By shifting my focus to the Winter Solsitice, to celebrating the themes of birth and light and creating my own tradtions I have found a way to shed light on the magic and recconect with the joy in my life as I do at no other time of the year, that I would love to share with you.

So how did I do it? Well I simply took inspiration from the Yuletide traditions that made sense to me.  I kept the parts I love of my childhood christmases, the tree, the presents, the eating lots of good food and combined it with other tradtions that make sense to me based on the themes of light, joy and rebirth.  By refocusing on Winter Solstice and the returning light I feel not only more connected to the world around me I feel it sheds life on all the good I have in my life,  giving me reason to celebrate and at the same time the birth of summer brings my awareness into the work I would like to do in the coming year.  My own personal cocktail of spiritual celebration and personal development work.

So instead of moaning about the commercialisation of Christmas or grumbling and stressing why not take some time this year to create your own tradtions to celebrate the light in your life now and the light to come.

Here are a few of the tradtions that I have adopted, created adn personlised that bring me joy at this time of year. I hope they light a spark of inspiration for you to find your own – Merry Solstice xxxx

Bringing in the Green

Throughout history mankind has decorated both homes and tempels with everygreen plants such as ivy, pine or holly. In some tradtions it was to keep bad spirits away, in others to encourage the return of the summer sun at solstice. To me these plants represent the coming of life and the perseverance we have to survive and evolve. Every year we go out into the forest and collect some everygreens and take them home to create decorations with hot chocolate or mulled wine. There is somthing very primal about this acvity and is a fun way to start the celebrations.

The Yule Log

The custom of burning the Yule Log goes backin time and is thought to be originally a Nordic tradition.  The Yule Log was originally an entire tree or gigantic log, that was carefully chosen and brought into the house  and decorated with ever greens with great ceremony. The log burnt for 12 days (the original 12 days of christmas) and then after the ash would be taken out and spread on the fields to bring abundance and fertility to the crips they would plant in the spring.

Every year I work with seting goals and manifestation of my dreams so I have interpeted the Yule log tradition into this process. Each year I use some of the evergreen I collect to make a sunwheel which I hang in the home all through the year and then burn on winter solstice with my yule log. Then I collect the ashes and spread them on my vegetable garden ready for the new plants and seeds in the spring.

Being grateful for the gifts in life

This time of year has been, and still is, a time of celebrating the living people in our life that we love.   A huge theme that has survived throughout history it the tradition of giving gifts. The people we give gifts  tend to be our nearest and dearest. Giving gifts is in a way a chance to acknowledge the gifts these people bring to our lives. By looking at these gifts consciously we can begin to identify not only why people are important to us but also why we need to learn the teachings their gifts bring to us. At Yule I chose one of the people who are important to me in my life and look at the gifts they bring to me or how they enrich myh life.  I then write them a letter thanking them for the gift they bring to mylife and telling them how much they mean to me.

My light in the world

On solstice night some people like to light candles to wecome back the sun. I have interpreted this in a different way. I light 3 candles but for a very specific purpose. Each year at Winter solstice I look at my personal gifts that I share in the world. And I choose 3 that I want to celebrate. I light each candle say I bring the gift of …….. to the world and I am grateful and proud that I am able to share this gift. This simple ceremony reminds me to be proud and grateful of myself. No matter how up or down life is we all give the people we care about something by being in their lives, this is a great way to celebrate and honour how great you are.

Random Acts of kindness

At this time of year I love to go a little above and beyond to share random acts of kindness around. By looking at the gifts I have in my life I feel so thankful and I want to be able to to spread that feeling of joy  around. So weather its a random donation here or donating your time there it all makes a difference and brings a smile to your lips 🙂

Inner Child day

An important part of my yule time traditions is my inner child day.  Fo me the winter solstice is the perfect time for me to connect with my inner child so I reserve one day that is for her. I do stuff on that day that I always loved to do as a child or always wanted to do. The inner child day is just a day for creating your own kind of fun and spending your time the way you love it best.

Yearly review

As I said before I work alot with goal setting and manifestation in my own life. And I see the birth theme of the wintersolstice deeply connected to this.  I don’t, however, set my goals until febuary. Instead I use the time from Solstice to feb to  prepare and plan. When the solstice dawn has come I find this is perfect time for me to review the previous year and begin to gather my dreams and thoughts for the year ahead.

Solstice night and solstice dawn

I find the solstice a magical time of year and wherenever possible I like to spend the longest night with people I care about eating good food and sharing stories, if possible around a fireplace. And then in the morning I go out to see the dawn. A sunrise is a beautiful thing but for me it is evening more magical when you know that the one you are watching is the first one where the day gets a little longer. I find it gives me hope.

I hope however you spend your holidays you take sometime to enjoy it and spread some of the new coming light into your life this year

Merry Solstice <3

Screenshot 2018-12-16 at 15.45.32.png

Advertisements

You are already living an Abundant Life

You have an abundant life. Didn’t you know? You do. We all do, actually. People tend to treat abundance as a goal, a state to get to. However we are actually born abundant. We are born into a world where the natural law is abundance. There is enough air, enough water, enough trees. Yet we are really good at making ourselves believe that there is a scarcity, that there is not enough. And in our panic we go scrabbling after more.

The “not enough” mindset is one of the by products of a capitalist culture. The whole advertising industry relies on our belief in there not being enough for their income. Because if we actually thought we had enough, who would react to their advertisements, right? It is this type of industry that sets abundance as a goal. But what if just for a minute we did something crazy and started thinking about coming from a place of abundance. If we took abundance as the starting block not the end goal. Now wouldn’t that be a different way to live?

Theoretically when we look at our life situation as abundant we free ourselves from the scrabbling energy of trying to get to an abundant state, and that my friends is the place where we truly are abundant, because we are able to use our energy consciously to enjoy our abundant life.

Now you may be thinking reading this  a big fat “YEAH RIGHT”, you may think your life is not abundant (oh how I am gonna enjoy proving you wrong) and you may also be thinking well if I am so abundant why don’t I have enough…………?  Well my friends that sense of lack you are holding onto right there is part of your problem. Remember the law of vibration. What we send out the universe mirrors. If you are sending the ‘I don’t have enough’ vibe into the universe and guess what you are going to get back. Exactly what you send out, lack.

It may surprise you to know that even multi millionaires can feel the way you do. Even they can feel they don’t have enough. Which tells me that the state of ‘having enough* is not a physical thing, it’s a psychological state of mind. And state of minds as we all know can be changed and improved with a little work.

So let’s take a closer look at this non abundant life you think you are living, because I promise you that if you take this journey here and now, you will start to see how abundant you truly are.

Gratitude

If you want to check in with your abundance the first thing you need to put into action is practicing gratitude. List the things you have that you are most grateful for, people, qualities, material things, it doesn’t matter. Just be grateful for what you have. You can make one big list or simply do a daily gratitude check at the end of the day

Harvest

This is tuly apt for the part of the world where I live right now as the tractors are working night and day to bring in this years harvest. But what about you? Have you ever stopped to look at what you have harvested in your life? What have you done. created or achieved that you are proud of ? Write a list in your journal it can be this years harvest or your life’s harvest and give yourself a pat on the back or a large glass of wine for being so awesome.

What is enough?

Now this is a toughie but  a goodie. Look at your gratitude list and your harvest. Is this enough? I am not asking this question to get you to think of new goals, I am asking you to look at all of the things you are grateful for and proud of and ask yourself if somebody described their life to me would I not believe that they had an abundant life, would I not think that they have enough? It’s power thinking and reverses everything. because the moment you believe you have enough you release yourself from hours of stress and agonizing over how your life could be better.

Great. So now you can see how abundant you truly are (I am now gonna take a moment to say I told you so ;P). That is what you are now sending out into the universe. I am abundant. So the universe will respond by sending abundance back to you. And you can support this energy transaction by a few simple practices that will support your abundant state.

Appreciate the now

Of course the gratitude list is one way of appreciating. By being mindful  of how awesome your life is, taking steps to appreciate and experience it fully radiates your appreciation of life. So log offline and have a picnic with your family, treat your mum to a nice lunch or just pamper your senses by eating your favorite chocolate bar mindfully tasting every last mouthful. Go out (or stay in) and appreciate the now of your life. This minute is precious because you can never have it again so enjoy it.

Respond

Another way that you can enhance your feeling of abundance is to choose how you respond to something. For example the  bills arrive. We all have this. We all hate it. But how about changing that response. Whenever I get a bill I say to myself. I am thankful that I have the money to pay this or I am thankful for the wifi this bill represents which keeps me connected to my family. A small energetic shift makes a huge difference.

Share

Sharing our abundance spreads the joy around. We have managed to end up rent a huge house in the countryside (wow I am so grateful for that!) So whenever we can we invite our city friends over to a weekend of having fun sharing food and drink and being together in a beautiful space. We give away what we don’t need and sometimes we get given things we do need. Doing nice things for people stranger, friends or animals makes life so much nicer for everyone. You can’t help but feel abundant when you make other people smile.

————————————————————————————————————————-

So how do you feel now? No matter what your situation in life, there is abundance in it. It takes a little altering of your perspective and behavior to appreciate your abundance, yet the results of these changes are immensely powerful and make life much more enjoyable. Rich is not a state of accumulating it is a state of being. You just need to define your own state of rich.  Starting from abundance breeds abundance. So why not dedicate this week to celebrating your abundant life and see if by the end of the seven days you find that you are richer and more abundant than you have ever been

Have a magical and abundant week  <3

 

Abundance is what happenswhen you focus on joy.jpg

Happy Lammas !

Today is the celtic festival of Lammas – the first harvest. A great point in the year to stop and take stock and be thankful for the harvest we have manifested throughout the year.

May your harvest be abundant and beautiful <3

13680450_1571430779819056_6605207068697198405_o.jpg

Have a healthy life by celebrating your success! (2 min read)

I’m sitting here alone on a Monday afternoon, in a cafe on a sunny day in Denmark with relaxing jazz in the background and a tall cold, glass of bubbling wine in my hand. I am celebrating my latest success! It’s lovely. I probably don’t look as chic as I feel but it’s the feeling that is important not the way I look. I feel fantastic. And part of the reason I feel so great is not just because I have been successful. It is because I have taken this hour to celebrate my success.

In our busy lives we actually have many successes be they small or large and yet in the hectic schedule they can often be overlooked and therefore go unnoticed.  All work and no play made jack a dull boy and the same goes for you too. Our successes in life are our high points. If we don’t acknowledge them then life is seriously boring.

In today’s society we are all incredibly focused on what is wrong, what is not working and how can we fix it. I am not saying that is all bad, good growth comes from this form of processing; HOWEVER if we only ever focus on the bad, we will only ever see the bad. And if you are seeing only bad then guess what? You will attract more of it. And that my friends creates a negative mindset and we all know how unhealthy and damaging that can be.

There are many reasons why you should celebrate your successes and when it becomes a habit you will find that life actually becomes EVEN MORE successful for you. Why ? Because as you send out a vibration of success the world around you ripples back a wave of success.

Here are 5 reasons why you should celebrate your successes, no matter how big or small, today

It feels great!

It feels wonderful to celebrate something we have achieved. It energises us. When we achieve something our body releases dopamine the happy chemical into our blood. And as  after all being happy and enjoying our life is what we all want, right? So why miss a perfectly good opportunity to enjoy yourself!

It’s inspiring!

 

Celebrating or success can be inspirational to our future successes. Just as we can learn from something going wrong we can also learn from it going right. Make a note of what you did that helped create your success and look at it when you are aiming for a different star.

It’s motivating!

It’s logical. If you are working towards a goal and it always feels like that goal is slipping away and is un-achieveable then why would you want to keep going. By marking our successes big and small, especially the small, we remember them and we can feel how close we are getting to our goal and that makes us want to keep going. Your success are proof that you can do whatever it is your set your mind to do.

It attracts more success!

Basically the more you celebrate your successes you develop a success mindset. And that is a mindset you need to keep feeding. By noting your successes you are telling yourself “look at what I can do”. Keep looking for opportunities to celebrate your success and you will surprise yourself with how often you have success.

It’s shareable!

Celebrating your success with others is a form of sharing abundance. Think about all of your friends happy pictures and statuses on Facebook that make you feel good. People want to have fun, they like to hear good news so let them join in your fun and make everyone feel great!

————————————————————————————————————————————–

So no matter what successes you have had today, big or small, it could be managing to do the washing up when you are seriously depressed or celebrating your first big movie deal, whatever it is celebrate it. Remember as Osho says “Life should not only be lived it should be celebrated”
Have a wonderful week <3

celebrate your success

#lifelessons101 – Inviting  financial abundance into your house and home (4 min read)

 

We want to be more abundant, it is after all humanity’s Utopian natural state.   Health, wealth and happiness  (not necessarily in that order) is something we all desire.  And if you look at the world’s resources, there is more than enough for everyone so realistically we can all live abundant lives.  Yet in spite of that there is an imbalance in world of 21st century abundance. Some people have abundant lives and others don’t. Especially when it comes to money.

Personally I have had a terrible relationship with money (maybe you can relate). For almost all of my life I have craved abundant finances to go with my abundant life. For years I have been putting my positive vibrations out into the world and focusing on manifesting the abundant finances. And what has happened…………..the exact opposite. It’s not even like I haven’t been working for my abundance. I am dedicated hardworking, yet for a long, long  time nothing has seemed to have shifted. Money always seemed to come along and trip me up.  Sometimes it has felt like money had it in for me. And yet of course it wasn’t. My bad relationship with money was created by me. Not by being dumb with my finances (weeee’llll may be a tiny bit) but mostly by my conscious and unconscious negative associations and attitudes towards money and wealth.

So I have decided here and now in 2017 that my bad relationship with money is in the past and from now on money and I are going to have a glorious future together.  It is time to make friends with money. This is the year where I am going to shift into my natural state of abundance. And I want to take you all along for the journey with me.

This is obviously not a journey that will be overnight (or in one #lifelesson101). We all know how long it takes to get over a bad relationship and make friends with an ex. This is one love affair that is going to take some effort to create. However in this first month I have made some real progress and already I can see a shift, if not physically but energetically in my state of financial abundance. I have spent this month inviting abundance into my house and home and baby step, by baby step, the universe is beginning to respond.  Here’s how I have been doing it….

Writing to money as if it was a person:

On the advice of my mentor I wrote money a letter as though it was a person . I let all of my feelings and frustrations about money gush out and wow was I shocked by the strength, passion and in fact unadulterated hatred that spilled out onto the page.

However it was a really positive experience as for the first time in my life I could really see where my problems with money started and identify what I needed to do. When you know what the problem is you are ten times closer to the solution so I highly recommend do this groundwork.

Forgiveness

If we have had a bad time in any relationship we need to forgive the other person and ourselves if you are to have a positive future together. Well I had (and have) a lot of forgiving to do to rebuild my relationship with money. At the moment I am working with one of my favourite methods of forgiveness the Hawaiian practice of Ho’oponopono. I could write a whole article about this but as Johnathan Davis has already written  a brilliant article I highly recommend you read that after this. (Click here)

Thanking

The practice of gratitude improves every aspect of life, no matter what it is.  I had honestly never thought of thanking money for what it gives me. I started by writing a gratitude list. “I am thankful to money for giving me food, my diabetic medicine, the opportunity to study” so on and so forth. It was exhilarating! It was amazing how much money does for me that I had never really thought about. Try it. Think about everything money gives you, the list is endless.

Continuing  on this practise of being grateful to money for its gifts when I now have a bill to pay I thank the universe for it’s abundance that I have the money to pay it rather than stressing about having another bill. It makes paying bills so much more enjoyable than before!

Invitation into my life and my home.

When we meet someone we want to have a relationship with we at some point invite them into our homes. We make them feel important and welcome and naturally they respond to the invitations we send to them. Now I am starting to feel more comfortable with money I have opened up my house to money and abundance by creating an abundance altar. I highly recommend it. The idea initially was to attract money however as I started to think about what abundance means to me I found that not only did I want to have representations of my finances I also wanted things that represented what makes me feel abundant Now my altar has my business cards, pictures of my family, silver, abundance affirmations, candles I made at one of the goal setting workshops I ran and a bowl containing slips of paper with everything,  everyplace and everyone  written on that makes me feel rich and abundant. Starting next week I intend to take out one of these pieces of paper everyday and that the universe for the abundance it has given me on whatever I have written on that piece of paper.  I’ll let you know how it goes.

A new perspective

As this month has gone on I am noticing more and more that instead of seeing money as this limiting and bossy thing in my life I have begun to view money simply as energy.  Wonderful giving energy. And this my friends is where the shift has really started to happen.

By seeing money as something that gives and viewing it as fluid moving abundance I have freed up a massive part of my consciousness. I am slowly emptying myself of my old negative limiting beliefs about money. as my enemy, which means I now have space in myself to see money as positive energetic expression of the abundance of the universe.

————————————————————————–

This process has shown me how abundant and rich my life is. It has motivated me to give more, to think less of myself and think more of how I can help others feel happier, the way I do right now.  One month ago I was coming from a place where I  blamed lack of money as the source of discontent in my life. And now? Now I feel abundant all the time. When the smaller abundances come along I notice and practice gratitude. And the more I do this, the more abindance I attract. I have in fact in this week managed to manifest a pair of scales in 5 mins for only 3 pounds. Desire, thought manifestation. It was honestly that easy. (And an affordable scales in 5 minutes is not an easy manifestation.)

Has my monetary wealth increased in this month. Not yet, well actually a little. However the doubt that I will attract more money to my life is dissapearing. And we already know that when you free space in your mind by removing negative thoughts, patterns and behaviours you leave space for ………………………… well let’s see what enters in the next month. I have a few more strategies I am planning on trying out so check in next month to see how my abundance journey is going

Dedicate an hour and a space in your home to exploring your relationship with money and make an abundance altar. I promise you that you will feel a shift in your outlook . (And please please do post pics below of your abundance altars so we can inspire each other!)

Have a great weekend and remember enjoy the journey!
<3

 

8.jpg

#lifelessons101- The ultimate instant stress relief – Set you inner child free this weekend! (4 min read)

This week has been amazing! Honestly I haven’t enjoyed myself so much in such a long time.

And why? Well this week I have spent a lot of time doing things that has made my inner child incredibly happy. I kid you not! (Sorry. Inexcusable terrible pun… I couldn’t resist it)

Seriously though the last month or so has been stressful (even life coaches get their fair share of tough times you know – I like to think of them as opportunities to practise what I preach and walk my talk). However after finding the 3 steps to turning my monday frown upside down meant I released my inner child, she just continued wanting to play. All the time. So I thought what the heck and decided to make opportunities for her to do just that. We painted, we played games, we watched funny films and we danced, a lot. As often as appropriately possible I took the non serious approach to life and was even to be found galloping around a car park and practicing human dressage! (See the wonderful BBC tv series Miranda.)

The result? I am happier and feeling healthier. I’m definitely more relaxed and freer within myself. The biggest shock of all was that today I found out that in the middle of all of this I have also managed to complete all of my major tasks WITHOUT NOTICING IT! Somehow just by making minimal daily lists and making time for me to indulge my inner child’s whims, I have had one of the most productive weeks I have had in 2017.

Now don’t get me wrong, I get that most of us can’t always release our inner child whenever we want. Not the best idea when pulled over for a random spot check breathalyzer for example. However what I have discovered this week is that allowing my inner child to rule the roost, I have also made other people smile. Which honestly has made my life so much better on so many levels. In the words of Miranda “Life needs to be more jolly”. And it’s true. Everyone needs to feel happier. I can’t think of a single person who if asked “would you like to be happier or more stressed ?”, would opt for stress. So by letting your childish side come out you can actually improve the world around you.

You might be thinking. That’s ridiculous! I can’t be childish all the time. Well no I expect you can’t if you interpret the world childish in a particular way. Especially not if yo look down upon children as lesser than adults. However when I think about children I think about how they see and interact with the world. Children are inquisitive, they want to know how the world works. Children find joy in the smallest of things like a pretty stone, a funny face. They laugh more than us. Children are in touch with their feelings. Children find every possible opportunity to play.  Children are naturally kind and caring. They are not afraid to show love to anyone who needs it or who gives it to them. Children use their joy and their fantasy to make the world a special amazing place and create their dreams. Now that doesn’t sound like so bad a person to be. Does it?

The challenge is for us as adults to tap into our childish source without stepping completely out of our current role. So if you as an adult want  to be less stressed out. To be like the children I described above  then you need to consciously give your inner child a chance to come out. This weekend release your inner child! Do whatever it is that made your 8 year old self happy that you don’t do now. Reconnect with the you that you were to find the joy in who you are now.

Whether you decide to continue giving your inner child opportunities to come out after the weekend is entirely up to you. However I can guarantee that if twice this weekend (once on  Saturday and once on Sunday) that you do something you used to love as a child, your stress level will be dramatically reduced.  It is also so much more fun to do this with a friend, so get your friends family involved – its play date time!

Explore you childishness this weekend. And on n Monday it’s up to you to decide if you want to build a new pillow fort every day and keep connect with your inner child daily or not. Choose whatever works for you. After all it’s you who creates your journey ,so you choose what makes you enjoy that journey the most.
Have a fantabulous, funtastic  weekend – I’m off to go and run around with swords and play vikings with Mr T and friends!

Screenshot 2017-03-17 at 18.29.55.png

 

#lifelessons101 – Sometimes doing what you don’t want to do is exactly what you need and comes with unexpected bonuses (2 min read)

 

Sometimes doing what you don’t want to do is exactly what you need to do. I know when talking about life or personal development we talk about making informed, positive choices. Facing situations with positivity. Sending out the right vibrations. And yes all of these things have value. However there are sometimes in life where you just have to do the things you are unwilling to do. It (at the start)sucks but in the end it brings you the bigger rewards.

 

Take last weekend for example. I was at a “viking” fighting training weekend (yes when I am not running around with a wand playing Tonks, you can often find me running around with a metal replica sword, bashing and being bashed by my friends. Yep I  am a viking re- enactor. I love to fight with r a system known as  western style. It’s on one hand similar to tag with weapons and a lot of historical background! On the other it’s an amazing international and ever evolving sport.) Now in this sport I am not the best, not by a long shot; and typically when participating in training weekend workshops I often have had a tendency to hide away and not fight with the technically clever, aka the people who are blooming good and are probably going to win every fight we have. Basically I would (previously) get into my stuff and limit myself by trying to protect myself from feeling rubbish about my lack of abilities by using one or another excuse to get out of the fights with said people.

 

I know, I know a low self belief spawned, self created situation/drama.

 

And one of which I was completely  unaware of until last weekend when I found myself at a workshop (which I had chosen due to personal interest in the subject)in the company of some the best fighters I know. So I didn’t have a choice. I had to spar with them. I was simply forced into doing something I normally wouldn’t choose to do. And what did I gain? Well I gained a hell of alot. Firstly I realised this whole self limiting and self creating behaviour drama cycle thing I didn’t notice I was doing. And once I got out of my reacting mindset and into my responding humble mindset I learnt more. I even realised how I learn best (which by the way is agonisingly slow, when it comes to doing things with my own body, it’s an Aspergers co-ordination thing). From sparring with those guys, letting down my guard, I learnt so much more because their ability stretched mine and wow do I feel grateful to them and to myself for allowing this learning.

 

And the benefits of doing something I didn’t want to do didn’t stop there.

 

By day two of the training weekend I was at yet another workshop surrounded by much more able people (some of who I would consider to be the best in this sport, this time with a humdinger of a hangover). However now I was aware of it I chose the what the fuck I am doing it anyway even when I don’t want to attitude. Instead of shying away from the harder fights  (in my head) I choose them and by the end of the weekend I had learnt more in two days than I have in two years of fighting. It was exhilarating!

 

Doing exactly the opposite of what I wanted to do actually freed me from my mental constraints and opened up possibilities for me that weekend. But could that be a one off event? Nope. Being as I like to experiment. I have applied this theory all week. Even today after a week of being home sick (turns out it wasn’t just a hangover I was also sick) I had to return to school, something I really, really did not want to do. And yet it turned out to be exhilarating. The welcome, the learning, the shared jokes. Even when having to point out my opinion against everyone else’s (something I don’t find difficult in English but hate to do in another language). Once again Doing the exact opposite of what my instincts were telling me I wanted to do freed me leaving me open to new experiences. Wow.

 

Now I understand you maybe thinking “I thought I am supposed to respond to my instincts so how can doing the what I don’t want to do fit that picture?” Well asked grasshopper. From what I have learned in the last 7 days, it’s about trying it out. Our brains and especially our unconscious can be very devious. It sends out all kinds of messages and a lot of them contradict each other, making following our instincts very difficult. Ultimately I have found if there is something you really don’t want to do but dare to do it anyway you will often find that it was actually something you wanted to do, you just hadn’t realised it. The making yourself do it was just the kick up the bum you needed to get going.

 

The key to gaining the most from the experience is to (as always) remain open. If you are closed you will only ever endure the drama of doing what it is you didn’t want to do and how awful that was for you. Remain open to the possibilities presented to you when doing something you really didn’t want to do and you will be pleasantly if not overwhelmingly surprised by the benefits.  The choice is yours, its how you choose to experience it.

 

So next time life presents you with something you really don’t want to do – do it * Open your mind and try. The way I see things, any experience in life is a good thing if we learn something from it. Because by learning we grow. So open your mind and dive in. Whether it is facing your hardest opponent, returning to work after being ill or even going to a gig on your own, no matter what it is, by doing that thing you least want to do you will find wealth of learning, possibilities and experiences that you could never have found if you stayed in your comfort zone.

 

So whenever you get the chance break out of yourself, kick your own butt  and choose to do the thing you don’t want to do. You never know what adventure you may start ….

 

Enjoy the journey <3

Screenshot 2017-03-10 at 20.32.39.png

 

(*With of course taking into consideration that your and other people’s safety will not be jeopardised. Always ce careful of you and other people)  

The unseen gifts that light up our lives – (3 min read)

The Yuletide season is almost here, Christmas is so close, the Winter Solstice is even closer. And hopefully you are enjoying a relaxing wind down or start to your Yule holidays. In our house, bulging out under the christmas tree are many, many christmas presents. Yule has and still is a time of celebrating the living people in our life that we love. In fact even today Yule is one of the only times families gather together and one of the only times we consciously make it important to show the people we care about that they are special to us. And as we learn from childhood we do this by giving and receiving gifts. However we actually give and receive gifts every day of our lives, often unnoticed. Yuletide is perfect for taking time out to learn more about these gifts, to learn more about ourselves and to be even more grateful for those people that make our lives special and our own ability to light up the world.

The gifts we receive in our lives

The tradition of giving gifts is one that has grown and stayed with us for centuries. The people we give gifts to over Yule tend to be our nearest and dearest and often people who we share the same dna with. Giving gifts is in a way a chance to acknowledge the gifts these people bring to our lives. And I don’t mean the physical gifts we get, I am talking about the gifts of life lessons, support and characteristics that shape and guide our lives. The unseen gifts that are there everyday.

By looking at these gifts consciously we can begin to identify not only why people are important to us but also we can earn why we need to learn the teachings their gifts bring to us. At the same time we get the oppertunity to value more the gift givers of our lives. I mean how often do we take time to appreciate the gifts people bring?

Is it hard? Not at all. You just need to really look. For example although I had a challenging relationship with my Mother (who hasn’t) when I looked for the gifts she has given me I discovered that she has an overwhelming sense of empathy and kindness. She has an amazing ability to love and a huge heart. She would give a beggar her last 20p and still buys christmas presents for all the children in the family even though she doesn’t see them.  Meditating on this I can see how first this gift has influenced me in nearly every human interaction I have had in my life, and these gifts make me so much better at my chosen path as both teacher and healer. I am incredibly grateful for these gifts

Finding the gifts of others

Look at the people on your Yule gift list and brain storm the following:

  • Who are these people ?
  • What is their relationship to you?
  • What gifts have they brought to your life? ( This can be stability, lessons, love)
  • For each gift think about your life and why is this teaching necessary to you life today.

Choose one of these people and write them a letter thanking them for the gift they bring to your life and telling them how much they mean to you.

If possible spend time with them over the holidays. Get to know them on a  deeper level and you may find that you have only just scratched the surface in your understanding of the gifts they bring to your life.

The gifts you bring

Gifts do not only travel one way. As we receive from people in our lives we also give gifts from our own heart. It can often be a challenge to recognise our strengths we bring to others lives.  However your gifts are as unique as you are and they light up the world in their own way. By acknowledging and naming them you will get a wonderful sense of how amazing you truly are.

Finding your gifts

What gifts do you give to others? (If it’s hard to think of you can ask your family and friends to help you here.)

On a piece of paper draw three candles and  on each candle write the gifts that you give to people and the world.  If you like you can light three candles to represent these gifts. Toast yourself with a large glass of wine and spend an evening being good to yourself.

 

Identifying the gifts we receive in our lives and the gifts we give brings an overwhelming sense of gratitude for the greatest gift, the gift of life. At Winter Solstice after the longest night the summer is born as the days start to get a little bit longer. What could be a more perfect time to be thankful for our lives and the people we love.

gifts.jpg